


Alex Reiland: In tHe MiNd oF A mAd GiRL

by ImaStabChuInDaEye



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2016-07-26
Packaged: 2018-07-26 20:24:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7588789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImaStabChuInDaEye/pseuds/ImaStabChuInDaEye





	1. April 5,2016

"What the hell! You can't just dump the girl you've been wit for a year, over text!"  
do it  
"Oh my god, for BECKY HOLLIS?!!"  
You know I don't care  
"She's so stupid and ugly."  
You're insane; why would I care about you  
"Don't you agree Alex?"  
You might as well go kill yourself right now  
"Alex are you even listening?!"  
you have nothing left to live for  
"oh um...yeah"  
"Really?"  
"No, not really."  
"That's okay. What were you thinking about?"  
"Oh nothing, just school stuff."  
"Okay, well I guess this is your stop, see you tomorrow."  
I waved goodbye and hiked up the overgrown and uneven slope that is my front lawn. In front of me was a large,glossy, brown door, behind a glass door.I took my key from my belt loop and stepped inside, instantly greeted by a wet dog nose to my lower half. dropping my backpack to the table beside me, I got down on my knees and began to wrestle with my dog, Buster.  
"H-Hey buddy, I missed you today."  
Breaking from the love fest, I stood up and walked into my kitchen to plug in my phone. What? FOOD?! yeah; I stopped eating anything but a granola bar, every once in a while, a long time ago.Although there was plenty to do downstairs, I ran up the steps, to my bathroom, so I could take a shower- and cry for half an hour- and get changed.  
.............  
I stepped out of the steamy bathroom into the comparatively chilly hallway, making my way into my bedroom to get dressed and go downstairs for the remainder of the precious time I had alone. After slipping into some sweatpants and a t-shirt, I ran back down the stairs to watch TV and surf the internet.  
...............  
I had a nice time talking to all of my friends, but I'll never be ready when I hear that dreaded sound of my mother's golden SUV pulling into our driveway. Now the torture began, hours upon hours of being reminded of how useless I am.She stomped through the house, yelling about how I never do anything-oh if she only lived my life.  
"can i please just get back to my homewor-"  
"NO!"  
you're a worthless piece of shit  
Great, now they're back again. The voices that I try so hard to distract myself from. The voices that keep me up at night. The same voices that drive me to think about suicide at 4 in he morning. The voices of everyone I care about, telling me to kill myself. But in the end, the only voice that I'm hearing is my own. The one voice i can't escape.  
just end it now  
That night I went to sleep, trying to block out my demons.Failing miserably.


	2. Apri 7,2016

"Where's Lillie?"  
"She's not here today, it's her birthday."  
"Oh cool, how old?"  
"13."  
"Alright."  
And with that, I was all alone again. It's funny how people underestimate their need for others. They think they could make it all on their own, but the truth is, they couldn't they need someone to tell them who they are. I needed her. I needed someone who understood me. Someone who distracted me. Someone who saw past my lies and accepted me.Today, she wasn't here, and the voices most definitely were.  
"Hey Alex", I jumped up, as any normal person who's surprised would.  
"Hey, Kelly. What's up?"  
"Nothing much. Do you have the answers for the science homework?"  
Of course, they never actually care, they always want something in return.  
"Yeah, but it's not due today."  
"Really?! Great, see ya."  
I try so hard to be kind to everyone. But, they all just step over me. I mean, it's not like it hasn't always been that way. I always have been-and always will be- a worthless piece of shit.  
I struggled through the day, the weather matching my mood, rapidly switching between sunny and the most depressing rain ever seen.  
I stepped off of the bus and began my four minute walk home. It was always the same people, the same old houses for sale, the same cars whizzing by. There wasn't much to do except walk and try to distract myself with a book.


	3. April 18,2016

Do it, nobody will miss you  
I tried to see through my tears as I rummaged through the cabinet for the fullest bottle of pills. My dog pushed the door open and came over to me, laying down and licking my thighs, blood still oozing out of them.  
worthless  
I pushed him away and began searching again  
stupid  
He stood up and jumped on my shoulders, his claws marking my back. I shoved him off and collapsed on the floor, a crying mess.  
you can't even kill yourself


	4. May 10,2016

"Excuse me?", I heard an unknown voice say. It was deep and gravely, but still smooth like honey.  
I sat up, rubbing the crust from my eyes, "Hmm"  
"Are you alright? Would you like some food?"  
"umm.who are you,exactly?"  
Standing in front of me, was a man in a beige trench coat, under which he wore another black jacket with a white dress shirt underneath. If I wasn't the gayest person alive, I might think of him as kind of attractive -minus the fact that he looked 30 years old- his disheveled hair was kinda cute, topped with puppy eyes that bore the slightest hint of immaturity atop oceans of tears waiting to break the dam.I swear this man is a giant kitten.  
"I'm Castiel, an angel of the lord."  
"ANGEL?!?"  
Despite my "agnosticism" I didn't really believe any of that religious stuff ever happened, let alone that angels existed. I sat upright, my eyes fully open and attentive. As expected, I wasn't in my bathroom, the lights were at least twice as bright and it had many windows. But there was no real view, only more blinding white light behind each pane of glass. All the furniture was either silver or white. A silver desk, a white leather chair, and a large array of nick knacks.  
"Yes, you're currently in Heaven."  
"So am I dead or dreaming?"  
"Neither, you're physically in Heaven."  
There was a long pause, leaving only a heavy silence. This was until another two men appeared in the room. The taller one had hair that almost touched his shoulders, a red flannel shirt, and some old blue jeans. The shorter one had similar attire, although his hair was much shorter and he wore a leather jacket over his red button up.  
"Hey Cas, who's the girl?", the shorter man began.  
"I've been assigned to protect her. Her name is Alex I believe."  
"Hi Alex, I'm Sam and this is Dean.", the taller man -Sam- motioned towards the shorter man.  
"Hey."  
"The Winchester brothers are famous hunters, well known almost everywhere."  
"Funny, I've never seen them in the news."  
"Not that kind of hunter, we hunt monsters, we try to keep our heads down.", Dean began.  
"Alright, well, Castiel is there anywhere I can go to get a shower and sleep?"  
"Oh of course."  
In an instant I was in a room with a large bed, adjacent to a bathroom with a full bath and a closet full of towels. I hopped in the shower, closing the bathroom door. When i was done, I found some large classic rock t-shirts in the drawer beside the bed. After putting one on and drying my hair fully, I hopped in bed and fell asleep after the insanity that just unraveled in front of me.


End file.
